Download Parsnips, Buttered: Bamboozle and Boycott Modern Life, One Email at a Time AudioBook Free
In this book I have attempted to solve each and every one of life's problems. And I have succeeded. Dear Listener, Using letters, emails, tweets and telegrams I'll show you how the things in your life that produce you miserable, low or anxious can soon appear trivial, insignificant and like a fish. In short, I'll butter your parsnips. Life is hard. We live a bombarded generation: Facebook, billboards, Twitter, Instagram, taxes, newspapers, watches monitoring our sleep, programs that read our pulse, terrorism. There's such an onslaught to the senses these days from the marvel any of us manage to escape bed. I love bed. While we have been overwhelmed and lost by the miasmic cloud of information, there are those that seek to make the most: there are auto parking fines, hate tweets, Nigerian email scams and Xmas newsletters from old institution friends about their awful kids. And just as we're getting round to doing something about it, we're sidetracked again. I, Joe Lycett, comedian, wordsmith, and professional complainer, am here to help. During my short life of doing largely nothing I've discovered solutions to a lot of life's problems, which I impart to you, dear Listener. Filled with a centurion of complaint words to unsuspecting celebrities, companies and anyone daring enough to clog up my mobile, as well as illustrations, one-liners, jokes and life hacks, this little jewel offers you a assortment of tips and advice* for all those manner of modern woe. By enough time you have completed listening to this book you should have learnt how to:
- Change a auto parking fine
- Manipulate the tabloid press
- Navigate social advertising
- Respond to hate mail
- Out-weird Internet trolls
- Competition a so-called ripe avocado
- Send the perfect Xmas newsletter
- Beat ISIS
- Take down multinational companies
