Download Stay Fit and Healthy Until You're Dead AudioBook Free
In Stay Healthy Until You're Dead, Dave Barry says that fitness and vitality can be yours-- provided you contain the discipline, drive, and the plain old-fashioned guts necessary to procure the required steroids. This manual can help, too, but you'll have to buy it and find out.Barry on executive fitness
Today's top executives eat teeny meals and run 10 miles and play tennis and work out every day. Naturally, they're so busy getting fit that lots of don't even understand where their offices are. That's why the entire U.S. economy is now manufactured overseas.Barry on fitness after death
A quick chill, to approximately 325 degrees below zero, yields a muscle tone that we normally associate only with world-class body builders and certain minerals!Barry on nutrition
Every morning you should have a vitamin A pill, accompanied by a vitamin D, accompanied by an E, until you've spelled the healthful mnemonic phrase: "A DEAD CAD BAKED A TERRIBLE CAKE, ACE." And eat all the fiber-rich foods you can shove down your throat; these would be mainly your cotton candy as well as your Slim Jims.Barry on junk foods
White bread and refined sugar, if eaten, cause death within hours. So it is important to watch what you take in, at least until you obtain it inside your mouth. Then it becomes pretty disgusting.
