Download What Would Susie Say?: Bullsh-t Wisdom About Love, Life and Comedy AudioBook Free

IN WHAT WOULD SUSIE SAY?, Susie Essman sheds the crasser levels to reveal how she proceeded to go from an anxiety-ridden, struggling stand-up comic to being one of the funniest women on tv set, playing Susie Greene on HBO's Curb Your Eagerness. Emerging as one of the most successful performers in her field, Essman runs behind the displays of your life in comedy with her funny cohorts, including Pleasure Behar, Rodney Dangerfield, and, of course, Jeff Garlin and Larry David, while also providing sidesplittingly funny intelligence on a range of matters that she's highly unqualified to expound upon, including men, sports, hypochondria, and stepparenthood.

WHAT WOULD SUSIE SAY ABOUT...

Relationship?

"It had taken me quite a while to get the man I used to be happy to commit myself to. Even the term commit is frustrating. One is focused on a mental organization."

MEN WITH DOGS?

"To be a dog enthusiast, I've researched a number of breeds and I've begun to understand that you can inform a lot in regards to a person by what breed of dog they choose to relate with. A lttle bit self-conscious about your cellulite? A guy with a shar-pei is ideal for you. They're difficult to find, but cheaper than lipo."

THE BEAUTY OF MENOPAUSE?

"I assume I simply have to accept the actual fact that I'll finish up a bald, fats, sweaty, irritable girl with a dried vagina and a full beard who never sleeps and has recollection loss therefore i won't even have the ability to keep in mind how hot I used to look!"

STEPPARENTHOOD?

"My mother used to share me 'you can't buy your kids' love.' Bullshit. You are able to, and it's exponential. They're like Russian mail-order brides -- a lot more you spend, a lot more they love you."

WHAT WOULD SUSIE SAY? is Essman's irreverent, refreshingly candid, and entertaining retort to the dubious facts of life that we all face.

Category: Essays