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John Bercaw's quest to Vietnam started out at the start of the Korean War when, as a young boy, he thrilled to see his first helicopter as it defied gravity and good sense by traveling. A circuitous path through stressed teenage years and four years in the Marines led him to Fort Wolters, Tx, and the US Army's Warrant Official Rotary Wing Aviation Course. For the very first time in his life, he noticed a deep sense of belonging. John's successful struggle to get good at the beast called helicopter acquired him an all-expense-paid trip to South Vietnam and the possibility to establish himself as a combat pilot. His 12 months of war had not been as expected. Awed by the lush landscapes of Vietnam and the unforeseen moments of war's savage beauty, Bercaw transformed his brain about war and its influence on the men who fought in it. He found himself in a position to overcome fear and hesitation in combat and do his job to the best of his capacity. Predicated on the books he had read and the movies he had seen, he had not expected the habit to the highs and lows brought on by the strength of war. The difficult part arrived at the end. Leaving Vietnam before the war was over, the rapid end to the daily adrenalin rushes and the sense to be part of something important-aggravated by the shameful reception experienced by all going back veterans-initiated a period of depression that haunted him for a long time.
